I created this blog when my sweet little girl, Kristen, was diagnosed with cancer, for the third time. After fighting for almost 3 years Kristen was called home to that same God who gave her life. I've contemplated on many occasions rather I should quit this blog or not. Each time I am inspired that I should not. One of my favorite quotes comes from Neal A. Maxwell- "Those who "plow in hope" not only understand the law of the harvest but they also understand what growing seasons are all about. True, those with genuine hope may see their proximate circumstances shaken like a kaleidoscope at times, yet with the "Eye of faith" they still see divine design." Kristen blessed lives and continues to do so. Her light continues to shine. As for me, I continue to "plow in hope" knowing well that Kristen is mine for eternity. Families can be together forever! This I know. Our family continues to live and to love and this is our story...

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Do Something Extra

These are a few of the children who  have stolen my  heart.
I can no longer sit here in silence.
These precious girls as well as many others need a home NOW.
Believe me, If I could I would already be on a plane.

World Down Syndrome Day is March 21.
The NDSS is asking that we 

"Do Something Extra"

in honor of those with an extra 21st chromosome.
One of the "something extra things" I am planning on doing is to be
a LOUDER voice for these precious children who are in orphanages
waiting for their family.
Each day from now until March 21st I will spotlight one of these little 
sweethearts from Reece's Rainbow,
in hopes that someone will see the love in their eyes 
and make the commitment to save a child.

Meet Catherine 
Date of Birth: December 2004
Eyes: Blue
Hair: blond
Character: Sociable, calm, affectionate

Meet Miss Bernadette  
Girl, born November 1996
Diagnosis:  Down syndrome  
Miss Bernadette, what a beautiful smile you have!   Hoping your Mama sees this picture and comes to bring you home — please don't wait!  Bernadette's age doesn't leave her much time to find her family.  She can only be adopted at all if she finds a family before November!   Her chance at any life outside these four walls will be over if we can't find a family for her.
 She’s a lovely little girl in appearance. Despite being 15, she looks about 8 years old, and a petite 8 at that.  She is a sweet little girl with plenty of energy.  She likes what most 8 year olds would like- dolls, playing with toys, watching cartoons. Lots more photos, she is SO friendly and was so excited to have her photo taken.  Interested families should be homestudy approved prior to commitment.
$9100.83 is available towards the cost of Bernadette's adoption!

Meet Miss Masha
Girl, Born July 2003
 Masha is a very special and blessed 8 year old girl.  Not only does she have Down syndrome and a personality that lights up a room, she won over the hearts of the ABC News journalists who visited with her in May 2011 when filiming their story about Reece’s Rainbow and the needs of orphans with Down syndrome in Eastern Europe.  They followed one of our adoptive families on their journey to Mia, but met Masha and so many others hidden away in mental institutions. 
Because Masha is in an institution, interested families should be home study approved prior to commitment.   Previous adoptive and/or Down syndrome experience preferred.  Large families and older parents welcome, married couples only, travel required.   
$2627.95 is available towards the cost of Masha's adoption!

These children need you!
Please visit Reece's Rainbow for more info.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Yes, I bought birds

I heard a rather excited Sara yelling from the kitchen,
"Grandma!!! Did you buy birds?"
I ran to see what she could possibly be talking about.
There she was holding a package of purple peeps.
I've never seen anyone get so excited about peeps before.
From now on. they aren't peeps, they are birds.

Tomorrow is Kristen's 2nd Bone Marrow Birthday.
Here is the post from the transplant day.
Sometimes it seems like an eternity ago and other times it seems like yesterday.
I remember the anticipation of the day.
This was her chance for a cure,
but a cure was not to be.

Sometimes I ask the simple question, Why?
Why wasn't she saved?
Tonight at the cemetery the sunset was beautiful,
it again reminded that I am not in charge.
There's a plan, a perfect plan.
I have faith in that plan.
I am thankful for the extra 146 days that we had with Kristen,
without the transplant the days would have been much fewer.

Monday, February 20, 2012

President's Day

My phone started ringing early.
Everyone wanted to know what  we were going to do today.
I had actually planned on a quiet day, maybe getting caught up on
some cleaning and ironing. 
Since cleaning and ironing are both completely overrated,
  I  decided to have all the kiddies come over and we could have a sledding party.
So party we did.
Sledding ~ Stew ~ Hot Chocolate
and in honor of President's Day... 
Cherry turnovers!

The party wouldn't be complete without a
 little something for Kristen.

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Kristen's Light

Yes, I have been a slacker.
I have had a few items that I have needed to finish and 
get in the mail for a few months now.
Finally, they are finished!
These are some of my favorite pillowcases because they
are for some of my favorite people.
I was able to hand pick the fabric with the child in mind.
As you can see, Hannah Montana, High School Musical,
Disney Princess, Thomas the Train, Buzz Lightyear
and even Mickey are included.
I also included Kristen's favorite lights.

I also had a request for a blanket.
Matthew was born with Down syndrome.
He recently celebrated his first birthday.
He also just finished 6 months of chemo. At 6 months old 
he was diagnosed with leukemia (AML).
On his first birthday, his mother had this to say,

"This little critter absolutely completes me.
He is the baby I never knew I wanted or needed."

I made this Mickey blanket for Matthew. 
I am so excited that he is finished with chemotherapy.

I ran in Target today, just to grab one light.
I came out with this...

Notebooks, Slippers and Lights!
Seriously, they were all on sale.
You see, these were Kristen's favorite lights, and the slippers and
the notebooks are perfect for Mother's Bags.
I love making these book bags...

I am hoping to make more of these bags and fill them with slippers,
notebooks, lotion and fun stuff for the cancer moms.
I know when I stayed with Kristen in the hospital this is 
something I would have loved.

It is probably about time I get to the post office.
Have a great weekend.

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

valentine surprises

 I went to the cemetery 3 times today.
The first trip I took some balloons.
The second trip I let the balloons go.
The third trip I lit some candles.
I then came home and loaded the pictures on my computer.
I found this little surprise...

just a fluke? maybe, but it did calm my heart.

I also spent the day making treats for the kiddies.
What would Valentine's Day be without sugar cookies and
chocolate dipped strawberries?

I would have to say that the children definitely had their share of sugar.

My mind keeps going back to this time 2 years ago.
Kristen and Rick were getting ready for the bone marrow transplant.
I'm not sure of the exact date of this picture, but I do know it was in February
and by the looks of Kristen's outfit, it must have been pretty close
to Valentine's Day.
She LOVED every single holiday and always dressed accordingly.
Here at this house, we are going to continue to celebrate and continue to include
Kristen in our celebrations, that is what she would want us to do.
Happy Valentine's Day!

Monday, February 13, 2012

If we could visit heaven,
even for a day,
maybe for a moment,
the pain would go away.
We'd put our arms around you,
and whisper words so true,
that living life without you
is the hardest thing to do.
No matter how we'd spend our days,
no matter what we do,
no morning dawns or evening falls,
when we don't think of you.

Thursday, February 9, 2012


Who doesn't love Valentine's Day?
The best part is the fact that you can take a special treat
to your friend, leave it on the doorstep, ring the bell and

I have been working on some cute Valentines for my grandchildren.
I made these cute cards with bubbles attached...

I got the idea here

Then I found this and had to make some of these...

The ones I saw were made with plastic bugs,
 but I thought it would be much more
fun with chocolate bugs. 

Can you tell that I have a little too much time on my hands?
This past week I applied for another volunteer job.
I enjoy my volunteer job in the emergency room at the University Hospital,
however, children and cancer patients have stolen my heart.
They are the ones that I would really like to help.
Next week I have an interview at the Huntsman Cancer Institute.
I am kind of scared but mostly excited.
I'm hoping my emotions don't get the best of me.

and now a Valentine from our favorite cancer patient.

Oh that cute little Kristen, She always wanted a box for her Valentines.

Claire is cute as ever.
All of Kristen's pictures are covered in Claire's fingerprints.
She still points to the picture and say's "Kristen"

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

moving forward?

If you can’t fly then run,
If you can’t run then walk,
If you can’t walk then crawl,
but whatever you do
you have to keep 
moving forward.

I'm trying, really I am.
Some days are easier than others.
I can say that I always cheer when I get to turn the calendar 
from January to February.
There is just something about January. 
My new goal, next year of course, will be to 
find something to Love about January.

I have tried to keep busy the past few weeks.
I have some sewing projects that keep calling my name.
I have a couple of sister in laws who have had gatherings the
past two weekends. It is always a good thing when they ask for help.
I was able to cut up some fruit and make a few batches of cookies.
Of course I did jump the gun a bit and make Valentine cookies,
because I love Valentine cookies.

I received this picture in an e-mail this past week...

It is a beautiful statue. I was determined to find its origin.
I came across two other blogs that posted the same picture 
first one here
the second one here
It appears it was made for unborn children in Slovakia.
However, It reminds me of children who have died.
my child, my daughter
Many days, this is exactly how I feel.
 Kristen  is comforting me.
It is because of her that I can go forward.
Some days all I do is crawl,
and I have learned that 
that's okay.