Another busy week. Wedding plans are coming along, good thing since the wedding is in 10 days. Thank you so much to my sister in laws for throwing the girls a bridal shower.
What would I do without family.
Kristen is just where she wants to be. Cozy in her room. She is still holding her own as far as platelets and blood go, no transfusions as of now. Her numbers are dipping so it won’t be long before she needs some blood products. Kristen has had a low grade fever all week. She could be working on an infection or maybe it’s the leukemia. She has lost 3 pounds and seems to be more tired and worn. Yesterday Kristen was light headed and dizzy. Luckily Katy was right behind her as she was heading up the stairs, she was barely able to pick her up as she is 8 months pregnant. I am pretty sure by what Katy explained that Kristen fainted or was very close to it. I have decided that unless I absolutely have to go somewhere I will be staying home with Kristen. I know there are a few things I have to do for the weddings, but if I can make a list and let someone else take care of things then that is what we’ll be doing.
I still find myself stumbling in the thick fog trying to process all that is going on, especially with Kristen. Someone asked me what I thought would be easier, losing your child suddenly or being told that your child is dying of cancer and has 3 months to live. She began to say probably the second one because you would still have time to make memories. I quickly replied that if you haven’t already made the memories then it is probably too late. I have no regrets with Kristen. The memories have been made. Now we can sit here on her bed and do the things she loves, watch Disney channel, eat pretzels, look at pictures, drink coke (for her it’s caffeine free) and stay up till midnight
just because we can.
just because we can.
We can paint our nails, order pizza, and look through old magazines.
We may not be going skydiving or Rocky Mountain climbing, and for sure we won’t be riding any bulls, but we are going to love deeper,
and speak sweeter,
and live like tomorrow is a gift.
Because it is.